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Nick's Disjointed Thoughts Part 1

With such a late Easter, we went straight from Easter mode to Annual BBQ mode! To further complicate and restrict my time, I had a clergy retreat at Shrine Mont early this week, which I LOVED; however, it has greatly diminished my time to write a thoughtful article to you. This feels well suited to the typical rapid-fire life of a priest at St. Luke’s, and it is a rhythm in which I typically thrive. In lieu of me trying to be profound, here is a bulleted list of things I’d like you to know more about:

Great Cloud of Witnesses

I write this on Maundy Thursday, and at the earliest you will read this on Good Friday. If you didn’t go to the Maundy Thursday service this year, then make it a point to go in 364 days at the next one! I love this service so much, and for me, it is when the roller coaster to Easter really gets going.

With all the excitement happening this week I completely neglected the Wednesday noon healing service, which is not uncommon. Generally, we only have three or four people that attend the service, and I rarely get an opportunity to mediate on the scripture, let alone read it all, before the service begins. Considering I find little to no correlation between my sermon preparation and the quality of my sermons, so going into a service blind no longer frightens me. Actually, I find it quite freeing and often notice new things and explore new topics that I would have ignored if I had the time to think about it too much. This Wednesday, I felt like I heard a portion of Paul’s letter to the Hebrews anew, which reads:

This is Me Procrastinating

Friends,

It’s strange how fast time is going by. The altar guild just got done putting on the red altar hangings in preparation for Palm Sunday, bulletins are getting finalized, and in a weird way I feel like Easter is imminent even though we have eight more services to do before we reach Easter morning. Next week there won’t be a ton of time to sit and write e-mail, edit things and try to do things intentionally. I’m sure the week after Easter we will come up with a list of things to do differently the following year, but right now we are on the cusp of it being too late to much differently this year. Regardless of our preparation level, we will start Holy Week with Palm Sunday this coming Sunday, which sets the stage for the darkness of Maundy Thursday, the absence of Good Friday, then to the new light of the Easter Vigil, and the sheer joy of Easter Sunday. It is going to be an emotional roller coaster, and we will undoubtedly be exhausted by the end of the 10:00 am Easter service. With all of the expectation, nervousness and excitement, I can’t help but still worry about paperwork.

How Does One Even Get a Priest’s Collar?

Friends,

I hope you looked at this past Tuesday’s mid-week message, because it contained an announcement about a new transparency ministry. According to the blurb the purpose of the ministry was to take some of the mystery out of the business of doing Church, and this goal would be accomplished by having a live stream of our parish administrator (Sue Bentley) working at her desk. It even included a nine-minute segment of Sue answering e-mails…riveting stuff. At the end there was a link where you could sign up to watch the stream whenever and wherever you like. Of course, the link took you to the April Fools page on Wikipedia. I thought this was hilarious, and I hope you did too.

On Craving Boredom

We grew up going to the Roman Catholic Church, and I hated it. Don’t get me wrong, when I was ten, I hated the Episcopal Church too. I couldn’t stand Church for the same reason that I couldn’t stand school assemblies; I was being forced to sit, be still, be quiet and to occasionally do the school motto, prayer, hymn or whatever. It wasn’t like going to the movies where I had some choice in being there. In Church I was a hostage and I learned the liturgy (order of service), for the sole reason of being able to determine when it would be over. In our case, this was immediately after communion, as we didn’t stay for the post communion prayer and final hymn. By sixteen or seventeen I was considering myself a Christian again, and we were all attending the Episcopal Church, and this time we stayed for the whole service. I had warmer feelings for the whole thing at this point, but I always signed up to be an acolyte just so I wouldn’t have to sing the first and last hymn, as I would be carrying the cross in and out. Not having anyone to chastise me if I choose not to sing the hymns is one of the benefits of being a priest. Church is weird.

Not-so Penitential Mac N’ Cheeseburgers

When we tried the Lenten Burger Night for the first time two years ago, I thought it would be a one-off thing and we’d be lucky to get a crowd of fifty or so. In general, I like the idea of changing up stereotypical Lenten practices that feel penitential for something like Burger Nights, but we took this approach for a very specific reason. We were at the tail end of the pandemic, and we realized that people were simply having a hard time getting accustomed to being back around people. It was hard to be apart, and it was hard to be back together, so we tried to facilitate being back together by creating something appealing. Instead of selling a Lenten event with something like, “you should probably come to terms with your mortality. Join us for some plain soup and uncomfortable conversations.” We said, “Let us make your life easier. Show up, let us feed you with the burger of the week, drop off your kids, and meet someone new.”

Ghosts

I am consistently embarrassed by the stupid things that I once embodied, and one day I will be embarrassed by the stupid things that I currently hold dear. Ghosts of past hurts and embarrassments once haunted me nightly leading to poor sleep and frustration, but in recent years I have held a more friendly attitude toward these ghosts. If you have them as I do, you should learn to trust your ghosts, because they are often telling you something true of the past. The very fact that they are painful, embarrassing or uncomfortable is evidence that you have grown. Ghosts are uncomfortable, but generally that are a good sign.

Northwest Arkansas

Friends,

Last Wednesday I flew to Northwest Arkansas to visit my sister, and I got back on Monday. This trip came about when we found out that my brother was going through an unexpected and unfortunate transition in his life. He knew that he was to be in limbo this past weekend, so he reached out to my sister and I saying he needed a trip as a distraction. I do not think my brother has ever asked me for anything, so this came as a shock. He knows that I am there for him and we are all very close, he is just the sort of person who is content sleeping in a mud puddle (literally), and is never in want. My sister and I were more than happy to oblige, and for four full days we stayed in an airbnb in downtown Fayetteville Arkansas and ate decadently. I mean like, 15 different restaurants and a surprise pop-up tiki bar speakeasy in the basement of an art gallery that was surprisingly luxurious sort of decadent, and I didn’t even realize tiki bars could be fancy, let alone be in Northwest Arkansas.

Missing Buttons

Friends,

I find myself again in the last thirty minutes of my work week in need of writing to you.

It has been a busy week. There is a lot happening in my background that may be in your foreground. One thing I have said consistently about St. Luke’s is that we know how to get things done. The efficiency of our BBQ is the living manifestation of this tremendous skill that seemingly inhabits all our members. It is no coincidence that a disproportionate amount of our members serves in the military or the federal government. Things are very difficult for many people right now. I have heard of other Churches offering space for federal workers to share their experiences, and some have suggested that St. Luke’s offer a similar space. Some federal workers have explained to me that this could be a very bad idea. Other suggested that continuing to be a safe harbor is a good approach. I honestly do not know where to go from here. Are you a federal worker? Would a support group of your peers be helpful? Contact me directly to let me know if it would and we will see what we can do.

Werner Herzog and Going Solar

Friends,

In midst of chaos, frustration and uncertainty, I am greatly encouraged by some events that have been happening around St. Luke’s.

Legend has it that the living embodiment of German pessimism, Director Werner Herzog, saved actor Joaquin Phoenix when he wrecked his car in 2006. According to the story, Herzog witnessed the wreck, calmly walked over to Phoenix, said, “just relax” and pulled him from the car. Once Phoenix was safe, Herzog simply walked away to avoid any attention. I find this story remarkable, because Werner Herzog desperately wanted to avoid what most of us would have embraced, which is to be noticed when we do something good. I believe that if I had witnessed that wreck, I would have helped without hesitation, because that is simply the right thing to do. Unlike our hero Herzog, I would have gotten a selfie with the grateful actor to share on my socials.

Don't Feed the Trolls

Friends,

As I sat down to write this devotion, I got a call from an unknown number. My phone does two things that are very helpful in this situation:

Carving out Time

There is something about proximity that enhances empathy. Maybe we should strive to have our feelings act in more equitable ways, and though we may try to achieve this, I think we are simply made to be more in tune to the joys and struggles of those nearby. Whether this is good or bad, it is what it is.

Avocados and Ancient Giant Ground Sloths

Years ago, I watched the most bizarre and fascinating documentary on YouTube about avocados and ancient giant ground sloths. Apparently, avocados once relied on giant sloths to spread their seeds, after all, the animal would need to be massive to digest and spread the seeds. They went on to say that avocados would have been doomed to extinction if humans had not swept in to cultivate the plants, spreading the seeds in the process. There’s one slight problem with this; THEY WERE TOTALLY WRONG!!

My Favorite Sweater

Friends,

My first day on the job as your priest was supposed to be on Martin Luther King Jr Day of 2021. It was a holiday, so the office was closed, and I ended up walking the E Boulevard Dr to W Boulevard Dr loop three times talking about Church stuff with the future Senior Warden Richard McFarland, who was also on my search committee. Both of our minds and souls seemed to be filled to the brim with ideas and energy. I left our walk overwhelmed and excited, and I remain thankful for the fact that he was my first friend in Alexandria.

The Time Between

The time between Christmas and school going back is somewhat nerve-racking, exciting, and overall, a good season in the life of the Church.

We just got done with one of our busiest weeks of the year, if not the busiest, and we can enjoy a bit of rest knowing that things went really well. I haven’t seen the Church so full at a 5:00 pm Christmas Eve service before and the overall mood was incredibly joyful. There is a lot coming up that I am excited about such as the new work outreach, sacred ground and EfM are beginning. If you want to know what these esoteric things mean, then I encourage to dig deep into our e-news! We also have another ambitious Lenten season ahead of us with another Bishop’s visit at the Easter Vigil, which is something I thought I would never get to see again.

Thankful

Friends,

It is Thursday, December 26th, and per my contract I am officially off, and spent the last two hours assembling a Lego train set with my eldest son. He is five and is on the cusp of being able to do all of that stuff by himself, but still needs me to help, for which I am grateful.

I am grateful for being needed, and I am also grateful for those whom I need. I am not sure how I could have made Christmas as joyful as it was without my wife, parents and infinitely energetic mother-in-law, and I am finding hope in all of the Christmas cards Leandra and I have received, something for which I have taken for granted in years past. I must confess, that we haven’t done a Christmas card in two years now, but we are determined to start the good practice next year.

Hey Darkness, Go Take a Hike

Big churchy days are interesting, because the mood of the service is typically dictated. Ash Wednesday is humble and a bit sad. I always feel a sense of longing on All Saints Day. Advent is meant to be filled with anticipation, while Christmas and Easter feel like joy incarnate. Going to Church can be tricky when your mood doesn’t match tone of the day. What if you show up to Church during lent and it’s all drab and contemplative and you just received the best news of your life? The dissonance between the joy in your heart and the somber tone of the service could leave you squirming in your seat. Likewise, going to Christmas services while mourning or fearful could feel impossibly difficult.

Christmas is Coming

Saturday morning will be busy at St. Luke’s.

We will be “greening” the Church, which officially starts at 8:00, but for all intents and purposes it will start at 7:15. Ladders will go up to hang the massive wreaths, garland will go everywhere, the Christmas tree will go up in the narthex, and by Sunday morning it will be clear that we are ready for Christmas. My special contribution is that I always put some ornaments on the tripods to make them look like Christmas trees. The only downside of our amazing new cameras is that I will have to forgo this beloved bit of decorating.

St. Nicholas of Myra Saving Pickled Children and/or Drowning Sailors

Dear St. Luke’s,

I wanted to preface this by saying that I believe the content of this article to be true, but I know myself well enough to realize that subconsciously I am mixing up details, so if you take the time to fact-check me you will likely find many errors. I could take the time to review my sources and offer citations, but like many of you this season, time is something I don’t have. However, even if I had all of the time in the world, I probably still wouldn’t check, because I am more interested in telling a good story.

The Luther Bowl

The best thing I did in seminary was play football. Well, sports in general, but it started with football. There is a big inter-seminary football tournament at Gettysburg Theological Seminary called the “Luther Bowl”, and a particularly intense part of our orientation to life at the seminary was getting ready for the big game. We had weekly practice to prepare, and it was understood that regardless of interest or physical ability, the Luther Bowl was something we were going to do together.